Many of us use the Bible as a guideline whether we are practicing Christians or not, and the Bible says many things about judgment including, judge not lest ye be judged. Which to me does not say don’t judge, but rather, if you’re judgy (or judgmental which is correct), make sure you can stand up to the same scrutiny (or not, unless you care).
Everybody is judgmental, even those who say they are not. Some are more discriminating when they choose their partners in the crime of judging, while others are not.
Judgment can be a broad brush which includes gossip-mongering, which to me is a subtle difference but in the end it still is judging.
Yes, I am judgmental and to say otherwise is hypocritical. I am also opinionated, which is a flaw, if it is a flaw, most of us have. In fact, I think all of us are guilty of that and the surprising thing is most of us would not readily cop to it especially the judgmental part. Calling me judgmental is being judgmental.
I have had to be judgmental in choosing the path to take in life’s decisions and I got it right most times. Other times I have fallen flat on my face, but do I get up? Yep! I do try to never make the same mistakes twice. I have had to look at the lives people live, especially those who should have been role models and weren’t, and make a judgment call that that is something I would never do. The joke of it for me is a few things I said I would not do I have done. And I never even realized I was doing it until it was done with bad results.
There are always those poised to watch you (or me) fall from some imaginary perch they created in their minds, even while they were not above reproach and that is their character failing to deal with. There was never a pedestal that I ever tried to climb but I can look back and see the distance I have come. That means a helluva lot to me. There are a few, a scant few, who gave me a starting push, and another few boosted me along the way, but the journey to the finish line is all mine.
Yes, many of the judgments I have made kept me from making those mistakes which does not mean I have not made others, but I learnt from the first error and never had to do it six, seven or 99 times.
I have been figuring out the world by myself, and the grace of God, since I was a toddler. I learnt from early that the helping hand I need might very well be the one at the end of my sleeve and I have little or no expectations to be treated with respect and kindness.
Since I have no expectations, and I am not saying that I only know unkind people, chances are if you think I am unkind you are just getting back what you gave out.
By the way, not passing judgment carries no guarantee that others won’t be judging you, just don’t get stuck by the judgment of others. We have to grow thicker skins so that we can claim rightfully our place in this world.