Oftentimes when men make themselves unavailable, whether they live in the home or not, women have to make sure that home is taken care of with or without their help. The job description carries a wide array of chores- everything from good clean living to paying bills, making sure homework is done and the children eat in time to get a good night’s rest. Be advisor, counsellor, chief cook and bottle washer. It is absolutely amazing that more women don’t drop down from the sheer exhaustion of it all.
It would be nice if the same amount of pressure were put on men to be more responsible and present for their families, but in spite of the non-committal nature of some men, women have to soldier on to ensure that children are not affected negatively by this state of affairs and sometimes they are despite strong attempts to mitigate the fallout.
Bearing in mind also that some women spend their childhood in adverse stressful situations which means they enter adulthood at a terrible disadvantage because they are more than likely unaware of the need for some psychological evaluation and treatment for good mental health before becoming responsible for other human beings particularly their children. Notwithstanding the stigma attached to even a whisper of mental issues however banal.
Thank God for strong women who sometimes have to step back while the men are being congratulated on being such good providers and protectors of the family even though they were not around much.
These women need to know that if there comes a time when they cannot be strong anymore, that that is okay too. If there comes a time when they have to step back because of a need to take care of themselves or to find a quiet place for soul rejuvenation then they are entitled.
We know by now that everyone has an opinion, and many are brave enough to opine about the personal lives of others, whether it is sheer ignorance or foolhardiness and we know well how to block the naysayers out of our lives, mentally and physically.
Knowing when to step away is also being strong for self and children, usually when the children have grown up.